Safety on the Ice – Barely and Very Carefully
Here’s how the story goes. In the dead of winter, two duck hunters and their trusty hunting dog drive their brand new Range Rover out on to the ice of (choose: _______ [a] Moriches Bay, [b] Shinnecock Bay, [c] Great South Bay, [d] Narrow Bay, [e] body of water of your choice) and, seeing that there were no open leads to entice migratory birds to land, take out a stick of dynamite, light it and throw it as far out on the ice as they can. The plan is simple. The dynamite blows a substantial hole in the ice; they get back in the car and run the heater until the migratory birds arrive. They step out with their shotguns full of bird shot and bag much of the flock.
So, as the dynamite stick is flying through the air, the dog takes off after it, thinking that a game of fetch is exactly what will make his day. Grabbing the lit stick of dynamite in his mouth, he turns and starts running back to his master and fellow hunter. This of course alarms the hunters no end. Seeing that waving their arms wildly and shouting, “no! no! no!’ isn’t working, they fire their bird shot at the charging dog – striking fear into a bewildered Fido. Fido turns to his only source of cover – the car. Running under the car to hide, all is fine until he burns his rump on the still-hot exhaust pipe. As he yelps and takes off running again, the dynamite stick, which was left behind with the yelp, explodes. This sends the brand new Range Rover, in many pieces, to the bottom of (choose: _______ [a] Moriches Bay, [b] Shinnecock Bay, [c] Great South Bay, [d] Narrow Bay, [e] body of water of your choice.)
Funny – but only apocryphal as every Coast Guard station north of the 40th degree of latitude was telling that story a couple of winters ago, swearing that one of the locals swore to them that they knew somebody that was related to somebody who knew the dog owner.
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